Anal Sex

Why do people have anal sex? Isn't it dirty?!

Image by Bianca Van Dijk from Pixabay

Anal sex is the cherry on top of the taboo sundae of sex. Very often the only view of sex is penis inserted into vagina and this holds folkx back from pleasurable experiences. Not to mention cisgender, heterosexual, penetrative sex is only one sexual behavior engaged in by a portion of the population.

Sex is defined by the individual and can include ANY activity—kissing, holding hands, intimate conversation, sexting, oral, solo or mutual masturbation, fingering, anal, spooning, naked time, shared bath or shower, watching porn, reading erotica, sharing a bed, strip poker, massage, and so on and so forth.

Anal sex includes but is not limited to oral anal, fingering, butt plugs, anal beads, and penetration by a penis or dildo.

All bodies can enjoy sexual play with this sensitive part of the body.

The anus has nerve endings that you can apply pressure to, stroke, lick, or rub. Most male-bodied folks have a prostate, which can be stimulated through anal sex. All bodies can enjoy sexual play with this sensitive part of the body. Penetration is not the only way to interact with the anus. Rimming or touching/licking the area around the anus can feel amazing. Remember that the pelvic area is flooded with blood and nerves are perking up during arousal so the entire area is sensitive to attention.

Logistics

• Consent always and every time. Poking a finger into someone else's anus is not your special surprise for them. It does not matter if you are already engaging in a sexual behavior and you "think" they will like it. Ask for consent.

• LUBE: Oil-based or silicone lube is best. However, if you are using toys or condoms take note: oil-based lubes will disintegrate latex and silicone lubes can react with silicone toys.

• Respect, patience, and trust. For lots of folkx anal play/sex is a new or vulnerable experience and requires a level of trust with their sexual partners.

• Talk about it! Communication is almost as important as lube. ;)

• Anal specific toys. They have a flared base to prevent full insertion or getting pulled into the anal cavity.

• Start small and work your way up to more fingers, larger butt plugs or dildos, or a penis.

• LUBE

• A cleaning practice before anal:

  • Using the restroom

  • Cleaning the outside of the anus with some gentle, unscented wipes

  • Performing an enema, if you want (not required)

  • Showering, if you want to feel extra squeaky clean

• Condoms for toys or a penis

• LUBE. LUBE. LUBE.

Like other sexual activities, anal sex feels good. This is why people do it! And no it does not have to be "dirty" unless you want it to be.

Adapted from my original post on DGOmag.com